Where memory comes to rant and rave, and heroes still use Burma-Shave

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late :: Keith

Running from the wild hobo, he knew he should never have skipped school; knew it the same way that he knew that kicking his boot out over the ice was a bad idea, and knew it just like he’d find out later when he finally made it home that he should take his time when it came to thinking up believable lies - too late.

    TAGS:  school, bad ideas, hobos, footwear, lies

lost :: Keith

If there is any hope of knowing what’s on the other side, I’ve decided that I better find some time to walk both paths, both honesty and lying, both less traveled and more traveled, so that when I do eventually stumble out onto the other side and get to wherever it is I’m going, I’ll recognize truth for what it really is, and that it won’t sneak up on me during some desperate moment and end up looking like an outhouse in the middle of nowhere, with a crescent moon on the door and a fresh roll of toilet paper stuck on a nail; and that when it’s all over yet again and again and again, I won’t be caught standing there lost, hopeful for something better than my own shit staring back at me.

    TAGS:  afterlife, contemplation, hope, truth, lies, honesty

history :: Keith

Looking back, I sometimes wish I’d chosen Rewriting History as my major in college, because I bet it pays pretty good.

    TAGS:  history, lies

Uncharted :: Keith

No, there’s no harm in a captain telling a good lie now and again, especially if he’s recently been bested by a fool cabin monkey.

    TAGS:  monkeys, lies

Y’know, ‘mouse is a trusting sort, but even at that I’m not sure if I should believe everything everyone tells me out here on the ‘net—for example, just when I’m beginning to get used to the idea that Boot’s a female-person, I read the interview that claims she’s 78, with pink hair, and a ladder fetish.

    TAGS:  boot - the person, pink, ladders, truth, lies

lies? :: hysterium

Crossing the room, she rubbed her eyes not believing what they were telling her but hoping that their lies would be put to full examination under the harshness of lights once she opened the door.

    TAGS:  lies

Donna and her husband’s long-delayed verbal confrontation, when at last it happened, was not as nasty as a television drama would have produced it; then again, the rustle and snap that punctuate household lies cannot be heard aloud, even by the best of microphones.

    TAGS:  marriage, lies, confrontation, CSI

Confronted, Henry denied knowing the call girl, but was soon caught in his lie when the topic of ducks came up.

    TAGS:  Henry, ducks, duck - the bird, call girls, lies, prostitution

I don’t mind not having butter for my toast, since last week, on Monday, at 5:20 a.m.

    TAGS:  lies, toast

After years of therapy, I was finally able to admit that lying about owning a house giraffe was actually nothing more than a lifetime of pent up frustration regarding my mother’s embarrassingly long neck.

    TAGS:  giraffes, embarrassment, lies, house giraffes, therapy

Sometimes on the phone late at night, when I said, “Is it okay if I just spend the night here at Randy’s?,” what I was really saying was, “Some girls snuck Randy, Gary, and me into their slumber party without their parent’s knowing it and we think we’d like to stay.”

    TAGS:  lies, slumber party

For breakfast Keith ate two buttery lies and an ice cold fable, or maybe that’s what he fed his son, nobody knows for sure.

    TAGS:  breakfast, lies, fables

The gums never lie.

    TAGS:  lies, dental hygiene, gums


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