The last safe refuge of the talking dog

What is Scrine?

• Scrine is the home of lost, forgotten, and lonely sentences.

What are the rules?

• Play nice. Be kind. Post only single sentences.

• Scrine gives everyone plenty of rope to play with, but reminds everyone that even the longest rope is capable of hanging a person.

• Censorship is ugly, but still not the ugliest bird in the sky. Happily, this has never been necessary.

• The appropriateness of all sentences will remain the sole discretion of Scrine's tender.

Who can play?

• Anyone. Reading along costs nothing but time.

• Membership is required to post your own sentences. Joining is quick and painless.

• With membership comes the unique privilege of calling yourself a Scriner.

What about privacy?

• Your information will never be sold, given away, shared, or even traded for an unimaginably delicious slice of pie.

• The above sentence may be the only sentence on this site that is 100% true.

's notes

Use this space for notes and reminders to yourself.

This is a private space. Only you will see your notes.

Expiration date is not required, only if you want the note to magically disappear.

A great place to keep your fantastic ideas, like, "Hey! I need to write more sentences about crickets and English gentlemen with unruly beards."

Please Choose

Enjoy the Benefits!

  • Words, glorious words.

  • Bad puns and top-notch metaphors.

  • Best secret handshake west of the Mississippi.

Member Log In



 Remember me

Show my name in the online users list

      Lost your password?

Become a Scriner!



A password will be e-mailed to you.

Scrine Restoration

Sentences: 100% (19120)
Comments: 11%

Confessional: 100%
Scrineblog: 18.4%

boot blog: 100%
'mouse blog: 0%

Logged In


Subscribed To:

  • What? No tag subscriptions?
  • Do you require a doctor?

yogurt :: Imaginary Keith

After reading the Fungi or Bacteria Exclusion included in his company’s Commercial General Liability Coverage Policy,

Fungi or Bacteria, a. “Bodily injury” or “property damage” which would not have occurred, in whole or in part, but for the actual, alleged or threatened inhalation of, ingestion of, contact with, exposure to, existence of, or presence of, any “fungi” or bactrea on or within a building or structure, including its contents, regardless of whether any other cause, event, material or product contributed concurrently or in any sequence to such injury or damage

Imaginary Keith knew he should test the backbone of the policy, and immediately called up his agent, threatening to inhale an unusually large amount of peach yogurt.

    TAGS:  food, bacteria, insurance, legal, fungi, peaches, yogurt

hmo-ptimism :: steve

I’d rather be me than my laptop, because even though we’re both sick without insurance, at least I didn’t have to be returned to the factory for disassembly.

    TAGS:  computers, insurance, health

bob descends :: Keith

Waiting in line to enter Hell, Bob amused himself with the irony of the insurance industry; he also met two nice people - Janet, a mother of three, and Steven, a fireman from Omaha.

    TAGS:  Bob, irony, insurance, Hell - the place, Omaha

Blind rage :: 'mouse

If you could bottle blind rage and sell it as a commodity, like, say, rattlesnake venom, I could get rich by producing it on-demand in nearly unlimited quantities by simply having someone say to me the words “insurance application process.”

    TAGS:  insurance, blind rage, insurance application process

I received a phone call from my insurance company this afternoon, informing me that even though I had been with their company for more than twelve years, my policy was being dropped because the underwriters had decided I was “high risk”, considering the fact that I’d been ticketed for driving without a seatbelt not once, but twice during the last three years; after hanging up the phone, I realized that what I had just experienced was, in fact, nothing short of an act of terrorism on their part, which, of course, wouldn’t have been covered by my policy anyway.

    TAGS:  bastards, insurance, high-risk, seatbelts

I’m sure my first mistake was even loaning my van to my brother’s dog, but the biggest mistake I made was not taking out shedding insurance.

    TAGS:  dogs, insurance, mistakes

Buy a Picasso and agree to sell it for a handsome profit, then just before completing the deal, poke a hole in the painting and sue the insurance company for the 59 million dollars in lost value, which should be, if you’re playing your cards right, more than what you paid for the painting in the first place; oh yeah, one more thing, you get to keep the painting.

    TAGS:  art, anarchy, crime, insurance, scams, schemes, Picasso, profit

Gondolaism :: Keith

“I’m sorry, Henry, but your health insurance plan does not cover cases of pre-existing gondolaism.

    TAGS:  Henry, insurance

When he’d met with the agent to buy dental insurance, Peter had gone with the Little Red Wagon Plan, which was not only affordable, but had a cute, homey feel to its name that appealed to the child in him; it wouldn’t be until several months later that he found out it only paid for pulling.

    TAGS:  insurance, teeth, wagons

Advice to my Stepson :: Br. Ezra

The day before he was to be married I advised my son that a “pre-nup” is good insurance unless he has the means to afford a publicist and a posse.

    TAGS:  insurance, prenuptial agreements, posse, publicist

What can be said about a society where it’s more economical to make whole the victim of a theft than it is to go after the thief?

    TAGS:  insurance, justice, victims

“What do you mean you’re cancelling the water-damage replacement coverage on my cell phone insurance policy,” complained the penguin, “I’ve only submitted three claims.”

    TAGS:  anthropomorphism, insurance, penguins


Copyright @ 2005 - 2018

156 queries in 0.8891 seconds