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Gin
warm gin :: 'mouse

Bronwyn looked around the office wondering whether it would be better (less bad?) to drink warm gin from the cat bowl or directly from the bottle.

    TAGS:  alcohol, work, cats, gin, office, cat bowl, warm gin


Soon after discovering that the campus has been attacked by huge mean tempered beetle-aliens who hate students almost as much as she does, Prof. Speigelman explains to her huddled class how they are going to beat the aliens using the principles of business writing that she has been teaching them all semester and sends them off to implement her plan, while she stays behind to create the necessary distraction, although it will cost her life, despite protestations and a very sexy, very forbidden kiss from a hot former lifeguard student; After celebrating their success and the destruction of the aliens, just as the students regret the death of a teacher who in retrospect taught them the secret to survival itself, they notice a shape far the distance that at first appears to be an alien, but reveals itself to be a human form struggling under an alien corpse, which when hurled, still smoking, to the ground reveals itself to be Prof. Speigelman covered in alien goo, but sexy as ever, who strides through her silent class stone faced saying only, “Class is cancelled for tomorrow,” and as she strides towards the sunrise, she yells over her shoulder the closing line of the film, “I don’t know about you, but I need a martini and a bong hit.”

    TAGS:  aliens, daydreaming, gin, marijuana


Booze and Due Dates :: OhNo789

Caleb slumped down in his easy chair with a bottle of gin in his left and a 40 page paper in his right; with one flick of his wrist he flung all 39.7 pages into the dying fire, and even though it was worthless, in those last fleeting seconds of the paper’s life it seemed to warm him, or was that the gin?

    TAGS:  alcohol, gin


I’d have to not drink an entire 1.75 liter bottle of gin in order to lose one pound of body fat… not gonna happen.

    TAGS:  gin


Drunk dreaming :: 'mouse

Two fender benders last night have me convinced that I should never combine tequila and gin and then get behind the wheel in my dreams.

    TAGS:  dreams, drunk, gin, driving, tequila, drunk dreaming, drunk driving


Shrine :: 'mouse

Asked about the huge mound of gin bottles out behind his shack, Juan responded, "That's not a garbage heap, that's a shrine to my liver."

    TAGS:  gin, liver, shrine


water, schmater :: 'mouse

They say the human body is 70% water, but Lucas figured his was more like 40% water and 30% gin; he figured if he worked at it he could reach an equal balance.

    TAGS:  water, gin


 

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