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A great place to keep your fantastic ideas, like, "Hey! I need to write more sentences about crickets and English gentlemen with unruly beards."
If Bayer can make aspirin with caffiene, how come Starbucks can’t make coffee with aspirin?
She actually thought she was the first person to say “I mean, it’s real, but it’s really real” when asked to describe tripping on acid.
when (exactly) did sex, drugs and rock’n’roll become ‘checks, prescriptions, and fixing the toilet bowl’?
Okay, before anyone gets any ideas, I’m going to nip this in the bud (or start the silliness, one or the other), because if I don’t speak up now, pretty soon someone’s going to steal my idea and start posting titles just for the fun it creates in the recent-comments column, such as “foot” so boot comments and we see “boot on foot,” “cedars” so we can have “snow on cedars”, “keith action” for the resultant “keith on keith action,” and so on.
The Schitzo Crack Whore (SCW) was not on crack she just acted like she was hitting the drugs a little too hard - for all I know she *may* not have even had a mental health condition and as far as her being a whore, well she wasn’t really, only in the loosest sense that anyone might be so considered by receving things from someone with whom they’d shared a jolly good rogering.
“Would it be bad to drug houseguests?” she casually wondered to herself after a mutual friend remarked on a guest’s high level of bubbliness.
the price of gas starts to cut into my drug money.
“If you’ve never felt truly relaxed, don’t worry - it’s because you’ve never done it right,” Grandpa reassured the visitors around his hospital bed, clicking his morphine drip button a few times for emphasis.
Since I reached age 40 I finally understand why my father kept pushing me to become a doctor “so I could prescribe him good drugs,” and now I am pushing my kids to go to med school for exactly that same reason.
Some of us (you know who you are) have access to doctors and psychiatrists and designer drugs; some of us have to self-medicate with chocolate.
/begin rant/ Okay, That’s it, I’ve reached the breaking point, I’m completely fed up with fucking drugs and drug advertising and I don’t want to live any more in a society where people eat processed mystery foods and pesticides and surround themselves with god-knows-what-chemicals in their plastic toys and off-gassing cars and sit on their asses all day and rarely find their jobs or lives rewarding and then they suffer depression or chronic fatigue or a limp dick or thin-fucking-eyelashes and “ask yor doctor about AbiliHardOniStatAlys.”/end rant/
Every time I eat a poppyseed muffin, I wonder to myself, ‘BUT WHAT IF THEY DRUG TEST ME’, then my inner monologue asks who THEY are, and I don’t answer myself because I lack the patience to deal with my nonsense.
I’m trying to convince my wife that she’s a dog (or a fish) after I discovered amoxycillin is $3.50 ordered from PetMeds-dot-com and $30 when ordered from the local pharmacy.
The Wright Brothers may have discovered flight, but in the ‘70s, we discovered that the secret of flying is to put shag carpet on the ceiling, mix copious quantities of drugs and alcohol and then lie on your back on the floor.
Justin kept his Coca Cola in a locked room and treated it as a controlled substance, unlike the Vicodin he left on the bathroom counter within easy reach of his kids and random guests.
So, it turns out that a huge proportion of today's punk rockers and generally disreputable musician types are into "clean living" and veganism and treating everyone with sensitivity and com-freakin'-passion and shit... count me shocked and offended!
I suppose it should come as no surprise, but I'd never really thought about it that way.. Shel Silverstein knows his way around his, uh, pharmaceuticals.
Just because my playlist this afternoon includes "Smoke Two Joints" (The Toyes version, of course) followed by "One Toke Over The Line" does not necessarily mean I'm stoned... next up, "Cocaine."
You know you're old when you have to ask your teenagers to buy you street drugs down at the high school because no one will sell to you.
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