The last safe refuge of the talking dog

What is Scrine?

• Scrine is the home of lost, forgotten, and lonely sentences.

What are the rules?

• Play nice. Be kind. Post only single sentences.

• Scrine gives everyone plenty of rope to play with, but reminds everyone that even the longest rope is capable of hanging a person.

• Censorship is ugly, but still not the ugliest bird in the sky. Happily, this has never been necessary.

• The appropriateness of all sentences will remain the sole discretion of Scrine's tender.

Who can play?

• Anyone. Reading along costs nothing but time.

• Membership is required to post your own sentences. Joining is quick and painless.

• With membership comes the unique privilege of calling yourself a Scriner.

What about privacy?

• Your information will never be sold, given away, shared, or even traded for an unimaginably delicious slice of pie.

• The above sentence may be the only sentence on this site that is 100% true.

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Use this space for notes and reminders to yourself.

This is a private space. Only you will see your notes.

Expiration date is not required, only if you want the note to magically disappear.

A great place to keep your fantastic ideas, like, "Hey! I need to write more sentences about crickets and English gentlemen with unruly beards."

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  • Bad puns and top-notch metaphors.

  • Best secret handshake west of the Mississippi.

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Scrine Restoration

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mango :: 'mouse

I thought it would be easy coming up with one pithy, meaningful, really awesomely cool sentence each day, but the more I think about it the more I realize there’s rarely a complete thought, much less a full sentence in my head—right now there’s just a single word, “mango”... oh, wait, now the word is “coffee”—but neither of those words, nice on their own, suggests any inclination to joint other words in a sentence that’s worth the pixels it takes up on your screen.

    TAGS:  coffee, mangoes, pithy

breakfast :: 'mouse

Honky-tonk music at loud volume and four cups of coffee may not meet the government’s nutritional guidelines, but it sure hit the spot today.

    TAGS:  coffee, music, government, honky tonks, guidelines, nutrition

coffee cup wisdom :: 'mouse

One of my office manager’s coffee cups delivers the following advice:  “If it rings, put it on hold; if it clanks, call the repairman; if it whistles, ignore it; if it’s a friend, take a break; if it’s a boss, look busy; if it talks, take notes; if it’s handwritten, type it; if it’s typed, copy it; if it’s copied, file it; if it’s Friday, forget it,” her other cup simply inspires with the words, “My lawyer can beat up your lawyer.”

    TAGS:  coffee, work, advice, lawyers

If it is a crime to take 15 minutes of time for myself to drink a cup of coffee and read Scrine, then I am a criminal.

    TAGS:  scrine, coffee, criminals

fix me :: 'mouse

If Bayer can make aspirin with caffiene, how come Starbucks can’t make coffee with aspirin?

    TAGS:  coffee, aspirin, drugs, Starbucks

breakfast :: 'mouse

coffee, aspirin, Rolaids—oh shit, I have become my father.

    TAGS:  coffee, aspirin, breakfast, self-image

Joe :: 'mouse

Every day without fail, Joe greeted the waitress at the diner, “I wouldn’t actually kill for a cup of coffee, but only because I’m too tired to pull the trigger.”

    TAGS:  coffee, puns

Succumbre :: Keith

For two long days and nights the ragged, tired and depressed man stumbled along, coffeeless.

    TAGS:  coffee, fatigue

Fortune :: 'mouse

You’re lucky, there’s nothing wrong with you today that can’t be cured by a strong cup of coffee and an attitude adjustment.

    TAGS:  coffee, fortune, attitude

Right this moment Chaos is kicking Order’s butt in an epic battle that began when Order brazenly (and likely foolishly) declared her intention to conquer Chaos and ride away victorious on Saturday morning.

    TAGS:  coffee, order

Bob knew that the energetic, optimistic feeling he felt while drinking his morning coffee was just an illusion, but that didn’t stop him from enjoying those few hope-filled minutes each day.

    TAGS:  coffee, Bob, optimism

Warning Label :: 'mouse

I just discovered there is a little tiny label on my Internet connection which says: WARNING - Connecting to the ‘net may suck all interest in doing anything at all useful out of you; combining with coffee and a donut in the morning may increase this effect and make you useless all day.

    TAGS:  coffee

Miss Jane wiped her hands down her skirt as she stepped away from the body, thinking to herself “Well, if you hadn’t got into the damn lift, chatting to your damn friend, holding open the doors and holding us all up, all the while carrying an infernal American-chain-we-don’t-have-spoons-or-cups takeaway paper recepticle of so-called-coffee, I wouldn’t have had to do that.”

    TAGS:  coffee, Miss Jane, polite violence

As she moved about and tried to get comfy on the slightly lumpy pillow, she realised that she hadn’t remembered the coffee.

    TAGS:  coffee, Christmas, cupboards, distress

Coffee 2005 :: 'mouse

The steam from the strong, black coffee rose up in front of him and, almost like a fade in a movie, his vision blurred and he was re-living the many adventures of the past year.

    TAGS:  adventure, coffee

They want to go to the Children’s Museum; can I get away with ducking immediately into the museum cafe with my book?

    TAGS:  books, coffee, parenting, museums

As her traveling companion stared blissfully at his reflection in the side mirror, she relaxed her grip on the wheel, thought to herself, I will hurt him badly unless he navigates me to some goddamn pie and coffee already, and cranked up the volume on the extended dance mix of “Master and Servant.”

    TAGS:  coffee, pie, roadtrip

morning :: admiral dewy wilkins

there i was….laying in bed, i could smell the coffee, and hear the bacon crackling, but i knew immediately that i was going to fall back asleep.

    TAGS:  coffee, bacon, sleep, morning, crackling

Sleep comes hard, the dreams are crazy and coffee is the breath of life that helps me through each day.

    TAGS:  dreams, coffee, life, sleep, crazy

good company :: grudknows

I step out of the office for a quick coffee only to find that time has warped, making a minute seem like a pleasurable hour and making three hours only seem like one.

    TAGS:  coffee, camaraderie, time warp

zoom! :: boot

Boot zoomed around the room, flapping her wings madly, leaping from chair to chair and singing the “I love coffee” song.

    TAGS:  coffee, wings, zoom

I consider my self a pretty good houseguest, but I draw the line at drinking my morning coffee from 6oz teacups.

    TAGS:  coffee, travel, mugs

“It’s Time who’s the culprit,” I told the barista who insisted on apologizing for my luke-warm drink, “not you; Time’s so ruthless it even has to screw with our coffee.”

    TAGS:  coffee, time, baristas

Minimalist Jones liked jam in the morning
But would only toast one side of his bread,
Then he’d wash it all down, not with coffee or juice,
But a glass of plain water instead.

    TAGS:  coffee, food, Minimalist Jones, minimalism, toast

It was at precisely 6:01 a.m. on a Saturday morning when Henry decided his life needed more direction, which was, coincidentally, also the exact same time that he realized there was no coffee in the house.

    TAGS:  coffee, Henry, realization

the naked boot :: grudknows

Who knows what boot and grud are up to - and more to the point - why does grud have a fork instead of a spoon to stir her coffee…?

    TAGS:  coffee, grud, boot - the person, feet, mystery, intrigue, fork, spoon, the naked boot

Beer or coffee?

    TAGS:  coffee, dilemma, fragrance

In Lieu Of :: Keith

I should take a cup of coffee and walk to the back of the property to see the pear blossoms before they drop, past the barn and through the nursery, maybe stopping along the way to see if the killdeer eggs have hatched, knowing I’m almost guaranteed a smile watching the mother and father killdeer limp along ahead of me, pretending they’ve broken their wings.

    TAGS:  coffee, Spring, morning, killdeer, fruit trees, pear blossoms

Good Friday :: 'mouse

Kat whistled a tuneless happy melody and even skipped a little in anticipation as she rounded the corner toward the bakery where she would buy a fresh jelly-filled donut and a cup of coffee.

    TAGS:  coffee, bakery, donuts, simple pleasures, whistling

“grbribbbbbrrrkkkrrrrrrrrr” growled the coffee bean grinder, “mmmmmmmmm” purred the boot.

    TAGS:  coffee, sounds, purr

... banana cake, which is followed by…

    TAGS:  coffee, bananas, games

Old Mother Hubbard Keith Bubbard
went to the cupboard
to get her poor doggie a bone himself some caffeine,
When she he got there
The cupboard was bare
So the poor little doggie had none Forcing Keith Bubbard to drive to the nearest coffee shack.

    TAGS:  coffee, caffeine, nursery rhymes

Coping Tips :: Keith

The girl at the drive-through coffee booth will call you honey once you’ve visited at least twice.

    TAGS:  coffee, nicknames, human interaction

The young woman dived innocently into her coffee, unwittingly setting hearts a-thunder.

    TAGS:  coffee, mouse, woman

1/3 part kahlua, 1/3 part raw tupelo honey, 1/3 part strong coffee (to chase 10mg of valium with….)

    TAGS:  coffee, alcohol, honey, recipes, kahlua

the freshest coffee :: grudknows

Each morning Fru Fru came here, the coffee was delectable and she marvelled at how those ‘in the know’ had guarded the secret - the barrista milked the tree and shot the bean right before preparing each cup.

    TAGS:  coffee, baristas, secrets, Fru Fru

“Well, if we all get trapped in this lift I hope you have enough coffee to share around” said the jovial gentleman; to which Boot replied “I have sharp weapons in my bag and if you come near the coffee you’re all going down.”

    TAGS:  coffee, ire, jocularity

“Well, if we all get trapped in this lift I hope you have enough coffee to share around” said the jovial gentleman, and Miss Jane slid the long, sharp knife out of her handbag and grinned at the gentlemen as the visions of blood filled her eyes.

    TAGS:  coffee, Miss Jane, polite violence, jocularity, knives, think twice

Coffee: It’s a pick-me-up, all right, but it cannot pour itself into the mug.

    TAGS:  coffee

Cap’n Dreadboot was often left flummoxed at the various super-powers of Captain Ponce Villonia, but none-so-much as when she witnessed first-hand his ability to not-ever-need-sleep.

    TAGS:  coffee, sleep, dread-boot, Ponce Villonia

As she passed each chain-everything’s-the-damn-same-store, her anger increased as rapidly as the once loved quirky corner mutated into yet another any-street-any-town, until suddenly Miss Jane and her flamethrower stepped forward, took control and began the burning.

    TAGS:  coffee, Miss Jane, polite violence, banality, flamethrower, burning, chain stores

“Pass the obits, please.”

    TAGS:  coffee, death, zombies

Unlike me, the “Doug” mug is very real.

    TAGS:  coffee, Doug, mugs

Oh, excuse me, is my decaying brain showing?

    TAGS:  coffee, brain, decay

There is no best way to spend the final hour before going to work on a Sunday morning, but sitting outside in the cool air, soaking in warm sun and hot coffee while listening to birds seems as good a way as any.

    TAGS:  coffee, birds, work, relaxation, sun, Sunday

Coffee mystery :: 'mouse

The french press knew it made better coffee than the drip machine, it just didn’t know why.

    TAGS:  coffee

coffee minion :: boot

Tammy wasn’t quite sure what she’d gotten herself into, but she was damn sure she liked the title.

    TAGS:  coffee, minions, Tammy

“Never buy coffee from a ‘grease’ no matter how great your need, they specialise in frying not brewing”

    TAGS:  coffee, life, brewing, grease, frying, things your mum should have told you

Somedays :: 'mouse

Some days Timmy felt he was nothing but a coffee stain on the white shirt of the universe.

    TAGS:  coffee, Timmy

Sometimes reconfiguring the computer network will require a second pot of coffee.

    TAGS:  coffee, computers

I wear lots of brown clothes, because I am very clumsy with coffee.

    TAGS:  coffee, accident prone, fashion, fashion, confessions

reason #23 :: boot

Fresh ground coffee beans.

    TAGS:  coffee, fresh, raison d-etre

Third World Cups :: Keith

With all his favorite coffee cups dirty, Carl’s only option was to reach into the Third World shelf, hoping for the best.

    TAGS:  coffee, third world

If I had a cup of coffee for every time I’ve forgotten to set the timer on the automatic coffeemaker, I’d be a happy man.

    TAGS:  coffee, forgetfulness

running on empty :: 'mouse

The empty coffee cup stared back at Wilson with its mocking, unblinking eye.

    TAGS:  coffee, scriners survival kit

It probably goes without saying but it is never a good idea to apply for a job on-line until you have your morning coffee - one might think he is applying for a position as an intimate educator - because you may not carefully read all of the necessary requirements and will find yourself quite surprised by the cavity search when you show up for the interview.

    TAGS:  coffee, cavity search, interview

Caffeine Withdrawl :: Br. Ezra

It occurs to me that this was not the day to give up coffee cold turkey…

    TAGS:  coffee, cold turkey, caffeine withdrawal

The syllable scheme of the haiku makes a poor sugar substitute.

    TAGS:  coffee, haiku, sugar, syllables

Give it to me baby, and give it to me full-bodied or not at all.

    TAGS:  coffee, moo, full-bodied

I hear there’s all sorts of bad stuff in coffee, but my mind and I are in agreement on this one; we’re willing to filter it all out.

    TAGS:  coffee, caffeine

This morning with a fresh cup of coffee warming my insides making me feel more human and lovable then I have in weeks, I decided to write a blog entry about the need for religious tolerance and then I read this and decided to write about deflowering nubile 18 year old evangelical girls instead just because it will piss off their parents who still think that abstinence programs really work.

    TAGS:  coffee, abstinence, deflower

Morning :: pam

Muriel wove her unsteady way to the coffee pot like a sailboat tacking in rough weather.

    TAGS:  coffee, Muriel, tacking, sailboats

Cafe Scrine :: boot

The downside to taking the chance for coffee and Scrine is turning up finding the old haunt empty.

    TAGS:  coffee, alone, empty, downside

When the applicant pointed out that her husband’s job before becoming a missionary had been at Starbucks, the chief couldn’t help but say, “Coffee and God - both important jobs.”

    TAGS:  coffee, work, god, The Chief, Starbucks, missionary

brown :: 'mouse

I don’t know how I’ll ever get this coffee stain out of my soul.

    TAGS:  coffee, soul, stain

You may wonder why I tolerate my religiously fastidious neighbor Jerry who diligently tries to save my soul every morning, but I can’t help feeling a modicum of affection and neighborly good cheer toward a guy who brings coffee and muffins to my front door every morning and then sits quietly as I regale him with tales of humping Mormon missionaries and banging every Jehovah’s Witness that comes knocking on my door – you just got to a love a guy like that!

    TAGS:  coffee, muffins, humping, Mormon missionaries

One morning, young Carmen stopped believing in Santa Claus; in the mid-afternoon, the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny had each lost their cachet, and by dinner time Carmen was an avowed atheist, demanding to know if coffee would really stunt her growth.

    TAGS:  coffee, atheism, Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, tooth fairy, myths

slave to love :: boot

I might think that the espresso coffee machine does my bidding, but who is the one spending her Sunday morning cleaning, descaling and grovelling, might I ask?

    TAGS:  coffee, love, bidding, grovelling

white coffee :: 'mouse

In my defense, I hadn’t had any coffee yet this morning when I forgot to put coffee in and ran a great big pot of hot water.

    TAGS:  coffee

As far as I know, the taste of coffee revolts me, and though it has no effect on my body whatsoever I am yearning for a hot cup with one creamer, and three packs of sugar, but alas, the coffee pot sustained major damage when it hit the ground.

    TAGS:  coffee, addiction

Mondays are bad enough it seems, but on the Monday that Kafka awoke to find it that overnight he had been transformed into a giant cockroach it turned out that the super had scheduled a routine fumigation and the writer went form great mind to obituary topic before his coffee finished brewing.

    TAGS:  coffee, cockroaches, existentialism, writers, Monday, Franz Kafka, fumigation

How Our Hero Learns :: OhNo789

In the last installment of our hero’s saga he laid waist to the mighty Mr. Coffee; in this issue: satisfied and victorious, our hero pours himself a cup only to find that there is no sugar!

    TAGS:  coffee

Coffee O’Clock and Beer O’Clock.

    TAGS:  coffee, beer, fulfilment

Every night I go to bed dreaming of a nice plump blueberry bagel with sunny cream cheese, and a large cup of joe.

    TAGS:  coffee, bagels, dreaming

topical exhaustion :: ecklektik

Monday, coffee, weather… all are apropos to the day but tediously irritating, and I refuse to engage them as primary topics for a sentence.

    TAGS:  coffee, weather, Monday

Artist’s Lament :: Br. Ezra

Someone spilled coffee on my Methodist coloring book.

    TAGS:  coffee, coloring books, Methodists

It’s just not right.

    TAGS:  coffee, tea

Foolish me :: 'mouse

Juan stared blankly at the coffee pot full of nothing but hot water and wondered what kind of evil genius had managed to disappear the coffee grounds from the coffemaker which he, alone in the office, had set up to brew just ten minutes earlier.

    TAGS:  coffee

Growing Up Swede :: Keith

Coffee was never given to the babies, but they were welcome to pour themselves a cup if they could reach the pot.

    TAGS:  coffee, Swedes

Palsied :: Jo

The dentist made my face crooked with his fancy drugs, and drinking coffee is quite an adventure.

    TAGS:  coffee, dentists

At first it seemed disgusting that their god sweated fresh roasted coffee, but once he’d carefully explained to them the convenience of such a miracle, they worshipped him with even greater fervor.

    TAGS:  coffee, god

a good morning. :: goliard

I woke to the smell of hot coffee, there was a smell of rain in the air as i drove toward a gold thread and blown glass sunrise that took my breath away, hitting all the green lights along the way; i stopped and stood on the edge of the canyon and waited for you to push me but only felt your guiding hands on my hips and smelled your cologne.

    TAGS:  coffee, morning, cologne, sunrise

coffee dudgeon :: boot

Beryl was never truly happy until the day she finally admitted she was a coffee snob and would, from there on, go into high dudgeons at any thoughtless offerings of inferior coffee.

    TAGS:  coffee, Beryl, dudgeons

Jimmy Freud wondered if there was something to his slip of tongue when in response to his hydrologist’s recommendation of a coffee enema he said, “I’d prefer a blow job,” when he meant to just say he preferred his coffee be taken orally with sugar and a splash of cream.

    TAGS:  coffee, coffee enemas, Freudian Slips, Jimmy Freud, Slips of Tongue

Henry slept as the others had a friendly chatbox bicker that led to a disturbing dream involving his best friend and a loan shark and a rough demand “give me all your money” that brought him awake straight away just in time - ding! the coffee was ready.

    TAGS:  dreams, coffee, bicker

coffee epiphany :: boot

Bakerina’s right - people are awesome.

    TAGS:  coffee, people, humanity

coffee :: boot

I have none.

    TAGS:  coffee, bereft, blue - the feeling, sad

Man Date :: Br. Ezra

I just got back from having coffee with Indrid Cold, what a strange dude.

    TAGS:  coffee, strange, Indrid Cold

quoting myself :: boot

I’ll just sit here and sob quietly into my complete lack of coffee.

    TAGS:  coffee, coffee deprivation

The lack of coffee is a serious issue.

    TAGS:  coffee, coffee deprivation

Henry loved wrestling the cappuccino monkey every morning.

    TAGS:  coffee, polite violence, puppets, Puppets Who Kill

I find it hard to manage misogyny before coffee.

    TAGS:  coffee, misogyny

Good To Be Alive :: Keith

Sipping coffee outside at dawn on a cool summer morning is to me the perfect combination of a few very simple things.

    TAGS:  coffee, dawn, simple things

I am, however, very fond of boxcars heading west and the smell of hot coffee on quiet, cool mornings.

    TAGS:  coffee, boxcars

One cat, one man, two pigeons, no ducks, a cup of coffee, a dash of weirdness, and a variety of baked goods.

    TAGS:  coffee, ducks, duck - the bird, New Years

If the Chief had known that tomorrow morning before six he and the police would be rounding up culprits from the mobile heroin den, he never would have told to his dog, “I’ll go to the store first thing in the morning,” when he discovered he was out of coffee.

    TAGS:  coffee, The Chief

Last Line :: Keith

Cletis had no qualms about reusing his coffee cup each day without washing, but the morning he didn't rinse off the previous day's coffee-lipped smudges, he sensed he'd crossed the last line of civility.

    TAGS:  coffee, manners, civility, crossing the line, smudged, qualms

Dipping the cow's frozen solid udders into his coffee did nothing except maybe give Bessie some weird bovine pleasure that he didn't actually want to think about on such a cold morning.

    TAGS:  coffee, Henry, cows, bovine, udder

While nine out of ten revolutionaries will say they like smelling change in the air, the truth is they actually prefer the smell of freshly brewed coffee.

    TAGS:  coffee, revolution - the political thing, Keith's Guides to Everything

Starbucks could greatly increase their customer base by selling coffee breath shots to the poor and homeless.

    TAGS:  coffee, Starbucks, marketing, Keith's Guides to Everything

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