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Cannibalism
Waste Not :: Keith

As much as Prig enjoyed killing missionaries and adding their heads to his shrunken head necklace, he never had acquired much of a taste for them in stew, although this, he sometimes thought, might have something to do with Prog’s heavy hand with the salt.

    TAGS:  cannibalism, missionary, salt, shrunken heads, stew


Stuart quickly learned that getting his foot in the door was not necessarily the way to handle his new sales territory.

    TAGS:  cannibalism, salesmanship


After speaking at great length with Naombo, my guide and traveling companion, I began to realize that the rules of cannibalism etiquette were, at least as far as I could understand them, very similar to our country’s “Kissing Cousin” guidelines; this made dining at night much less disturbing, since I was almost positive I was related to no one within 4000 miles of our camp.

    TAGS:  etiquette, cannibalism, kissing cousins, Naombo


Naombo often wanted to complain to his wife about her cooking, but knew he slept too soundly to risk it.

    TAGS:  cannibalism, Naombo


What’s worse is I should have been paying more attention because last summer I made an almost identical mistake when I asked my Appalachian relatives to pick me up some ground chuck and they brought me ground ‘chuck.

    TAGS:  cannibalism


Last week I forgot my houseguest Jamoch’s tribal affiliation and mistakenly asked him to pick up some “ground chuck” for me; I plan to just smile blandly when my guests at this weekend’s BBQ ask the secret to my great hamburgers.

    TAGS:  cannibalism


“We will bury you…in a bed of salt and roast you in a 425-degree oven at 15 minutes per pound; you will be moist and flavorful, and our guests will be delighted by the presentation as we chip away at the salt crust!”

    TAGS:  cannibalism, parallel universes


Corporate Cannibalism :: Br. Ezra

I was the main ingredient in my boss’s mishegas stew today.

    TAGS:  cannibalism, craziness, Stew, mishegas, Yiddish


 

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